Toast

The magical combination of bread and heat. It makes breakfast worth having, and gives butter a purpose. It's quite tasty and the way it crumbles when you bite into it makes your morning that much better. Unfortunately, it becomes unacceptable to eat it at any other time of day. Ever had it for lunch? Only if cheese is smashed between it. Not for dinner, or dessert unless you've got an awesome dish I don't know about. It's the poster boy of breakfast (egg is the poster girl) and the hallmark of bread. And in case your not clear on it, bread goes into a toaster, not toast.

Champagne wouldn't be the same without having a moment to use our fancy glasses to salute a well known cause or deserving person. A toast is given at weddings, graduations, birthdays, poker nights, and many other events I guess....... don't know, I don't really drink champagne. But I suppose we could use grape juice or Mountain Dew and it would be just fine. Toasts are meant to be meaningful moments to express how you really feel, but they end up being moments where grown adults have to relive the fourth grade speech competition. Out of the two, I prefer the first kind of toast, but I suppose when I like alcohol, (if that ever happens) I will enjoy a moment of real emotion followed by heavy drinking to make it go away. Let's raise our glasses to breakfast and get refills on the Orange Juice while we are at it. Happy Eatings.

Sincerely,
Captain Obvious